Having a cat for the first time made me notice everything

I cannot really remember exactly what Sanmu did during those first few days at home. But I do remember how unusually alert I felt as someone living with a cat for the first time.

Especially at night.

A kitten in the room meant sounds and sensations that had not been there before. It might jump around on the bed, walk across me, step on my chest, or even my face. At first, you pay particular attention to these little things that have never happened in your life before.

I can no longer say precisely what happened on any one occasion. I cannot tell the story of Sanmu's first night at home from beginning to end. I only remember these small, sudden surprises entering my life, with a little delight mixed in. So this was what having a cat at home felt like.

It was the same during the day. Every so often, I would check what Sanmu was doing and what had caught its interest.

After all, I had never had a pet before. I had painted other people's cats, but a cat in a photograph stays still, and you can look at it for as long as you like. With a real kitten in your home, you do not know what it will do next. There was so much curiosity and novelty. I kept wanting to look a little more and find out a little more.

At the same time, there were worries.

I paint, so the room held art supplies and water for rinsing brushes, along with an aquarium and plants. I had long been used to those things being where they were. Once the kitten arrived, questions appeared that I had never needed to ask: would it scratch the art supplies? Knock something over? Chew the plants, or drink the brush water or water from the aquarium?

Those were things I worried about at the time. That does not mean Sanmu actually did every one of them.

Looking back, it was easy for my attention to go to those places in the first few days. You do not yet know this cat, how it will treat the things in the room, or how your familiar life might change. Even the smallest movement seems worth noticing.

I found it all new, while also feeling a little on edge. I wanted to watch Sanmu, and worried about what might happen. Perhaps other people with their first cat have felt the same. That was how it was for me, anyway.

Then it gradually got better.

If you ask which day I began to relax, or whether something happened that made me feel Sanmu could safely live at home, I cannot think of an answer. The change had no clear dividing line.

The days simply passed, and Sanmu did not cause me any trouble. The damage I had initially worried about did not seem to happen. After those days, the home was still fine, and so were the things in it. Naturally, I became less tense.

Then your attention is no longer always on "Will it break something?" At first, you do not know the cat, so you consider every possibility. After a little more time together, you have a general sense of what it is like, and no longer need to keep thinking about those things.

That is roughly what I mean by getting used to it. I did not deliberately decide that, from today onward, I would stop watching Sanmu. There was no scene in which I suddenly relaxed. Many small worries simply diminished, bit by bit, through everyday life together.

Of course, the curiosity and affection remained. I could just look at Sanmu without all those worries attached. A cat moving around at home, and the sounds and sensations it brought, gradually became ordinary.

Yesterday I wrote that Sanmu and I eventually found a way of living together that felt just right. Looking back to the beginning, there was a process before that. The first time you share a home with a cat, you need time to get to know it before you discover which worries you can slowly put down.

I have forgotten many details of when Sanmu first arrived. And I really cannot say exactly when I got used to having a cat.

Without quite noticing, I simply began to feel at ease.